Join me for a smoke as I have a phone conversation with a nurse friend about my smoking and my health. We discuss, how I know it's bad for me and my lungs are most likely black. How it could affect my health in such a bad way but I just can't stop. I don't want to stop. I enjoy it too much as it is very much a relaxation mechanism for me. Work stresses me out so much, it's the only thing I can do to keep my sanity. I really should stop before my health gets any worse than it is and I really just cant.