Calling my friend: "Honey are you still working? Do you know what time it is? I just wish you were here with me. I am tired, but I have been waiting for you for the past 2 hours. I'll wear a shirt of yours"

*sweet romantic talk to my honey while I get completely naked*

After the phone call, I cheerfully open my friend's closet and take out a shirt. I smell it, joyfully - but what's that?! THAT'S NOT MY PERFUME.. this is from a woman.. grrrr.. oh my god... oh my... god. He is NOT working late, he is getting LAID!

That's it, you are going to pay for this, 'sweety'.

I take the expensive shirt and just piss on it, right there in the bedroom. Just like that. I am so pissed off about him. I keep waiting day after day because he has to work so much, but he is meeting other women.

That's really it, I am going to soak all his clothes. I piss and piss and take more clothes and throw them in between, then piss more and more. I will wipe the smell of these other women out. You will only smell ME. I am so angry.

You are not going to have anything to wear when I am done pissing and don't you expect me to wash any of your clothes ever again! How is that for a girlfriend experience, huh?