You know how you feel when you open up that little brown bottle. Weak. Giddy. Dumb. And I love seeing you that way – oh so vulnerable and stupid.

It feels right, doesn't it? It feels right to sniff that bottle, hold that breath, and feel yourself falling deeper and deeper into a state of sheer idiocy for me. It feels right to drool like a babbling jackass for me. It feels right to goon for me.

In fact, let's forget you were ever a person. A man. For me? You're only an idiot goon.

Grab that bottle. Let's get started gooning until your brain melts.