You know you want to buy this clip.

You do love spending money on me, after all. That little rush of excitement you get after you purchase my clip – you know money is going straight into my pocket, and it feels so good . After all, it's the closest you can get to me. You can't touch me, you can't feel me, but you sure as hell can spend on me

So go ahead, little piggy, buy this clip. You know it's calling to you. It's the only way a loser like you can make someone like me happy.