Apparently, my s*n has fancied me for some time now. He offered to rub some tanning lotion on my back so I wouldn't burn. Considerate, right? And innocent, I thought! But when the warm 'lotion' hit my back it was suddenly clear to me that it wasn't lotion at all. My strapping step-son had released his testosterone all over me and he wouldn't be content until he actually, get this, massaged it in thoroughly!