I'm so excited to share my idea with my chief civil servant. We need to bring back judicial corporal punishment to clear the backlog of people waiting for prison sentences, and to please our middle England voters. I can't wait, this will be brilliant. Kate, my assistant, is less keen, saying that caning is too harsh, and that the slipper would be more than sufficient punishment for small crimes. For example, for driving at 90mph in a 30mph zone. Or for perverting the course of justice by making my boyfriend say he was the one driving the car... Kate suddenly seems to know far more abou...

I'm so excited to share my idea with my chief civil servant. We need to bring back judicial corporal punishment to clear the backlog of people waiting for prison sentences, and to please our middle England voters. I can't wait, this will be brilliant. Kate, my assistant, is less keen, saying that caning is too harsh, and that the slipper would be more than sufficient punishment for small crimes. For example, for driving at 90mph in a 30mph zone. Or for perverting the course of justice by making my boyfriend say he was the one driving the car... Kate suddenly seems to know far more about my life than I'd expected, and suddenly I find myself trapped in a situation where I've agreed to take a slippering from my aide. On the BARE BOTTOM!!!