I'm on the phone to Hannah, who organises a huge charity ladies' tea party every year. Her maid has let her down and there's no one to serve the tea! But I've got an amazing idea; you, my husband, are at home all week because your boss didn't want you to go to Singapore on business after all (am VERY CONCERNED about this, and am suspicious its because you've not made yourself indispensable enough). YOU can be the maid! Yes, it's ladies only, but we can dress you up, can't we? I've got this lovely pink dress you can wear, and Hannah will give you the apron and frilly cap, and you can wear my...

I'm on the phone to Hannah, who organises a huge charity ladies' tea party every year. Her maid has let her down and there's no one to serve the tea! But I've got an amazing idea; you, my husband, are at home all week because your boss didn't want you to go to Singapore on business after all (am VERY CONCERNED about this, and am suspicious its because you've not made yourself indispensable enough). YOU can be the maid! Yes, it's ladies only, but we can dress you up, can't we? I've got this lovely pink dress you can wear, and Hannah will give you the apron and frilly cap, and you can wear my high heeled white sandals. Hmmm, what should we do about your penis though? We can't have it flapping around annoying everyone. Fortunately, I've got some ideas...