Matthew is reluctant to have a vasectomy and, luckily for him and his wife Chloe, fertility expert Nikki has a pioneering new technique for temporary sterilisation of men that she's keen to share. The technique - still awaiting ethical clearance - simply involves kicking, kneeing, punching and squeezing Matthew's balls to the brink of popping. After all that pressure, they won't be making any working swimmers for a while!

Matthew is reluctant to have a vasectomy and, luckily for him and his wife Chloe, fertility expert Nikki has a pioneering new technique for temporary sterilisation of men that she's keen to share. The technique - still awaiting ethical clearance - simply involves kicking, kneeing, punching and squeezing Matthew's balls to the brink of popping. After all that pressure, they won't be making any working swimmers for a while!