Aren't you too old to be trick-or-treating? I just came back from a Halloween party and would you believe it--they had NO candy there! Well, I guess since I'm your step mom I should look over your candy and check it for safety reasons. You can never be too careful. I learned all about it on the news that candy can be full of harmful things. Wow look at this haul--all my favorites. I love gummies! You know, looking at this now I think I'll have to try some of this candy for 'safety reasons'. I eagerly shove candy in my mouth and tell you not to worry I'm sure there will be some safe candy fo...

Aren't you too old to be trick-or-treating? I just came back from a Halloween party and would you believe it--they had NO candy there! Well, I guess since I'm your step mom I should look over your candy and check it for safety reasons. You can never be too careful. I learned all about it on the news that candy can be full of harmful things. Wow look at this haul--all my favorites. I love gummies! You know, looking at this now I think I'll have to try some of this candy for 'safety reasons'. I eagerly shove candy in my mouth and tell you not to worry I'm sure there will be some safe candy for you to eat. I jokingly offer you some candy before declaring it unsafe and gobbling it all up for myself. You come back to find me stuffed with tons of empty wrappers and my bunnysuit zipped down exposing the biggest bloated belly you've seen your step mom have. I can barely move, stepson! Be a good boy and help me up! And NONE of the candy was safe either! Happy halloween!