Ever wonder what it would be like to get a Valentine day gift from me? I bet you do. I bet you sit in bed at night and fantasize about my affection. How sweet of a girlfriend I must be. Too bad you're such a loser, you'll never know such joy. Of course that doesn't mean I don't have a gift for you, in fact I do. I brought you chocolates, chewed up and spit out, red velvet cupcakes, mashed up by my feet, and this special video to watch while you consume them both. Aren't I sweet? Happy Valentines day, reject.