How do I get myself in these predicaments?

I just sat down to enjoy a big bucket of fried chicken, but I accidentally drop the remote under the couch! When I go to reach for it, I realize that I've become stuck under the living room table!! Until my boyfriend gets home, there's no one here to free me! And my food is getting cold! I manage to slide my plate down and feed myself until help arrives.
Some help he turned out to be- exploiting my situation to grope and hand-feed me. I'm so helpless. All I can do is clean my plate and hope that's enough for him to help me.