So you are here on an emergency appointment? Your belly is aching? And it seems to have gotten bigger lately? I need you to undress and lay on the examination table on your back. I will listen to your tummy with the stethoscope and probe your anus with my fingers. Don't worry, I will use lots of lubricant. Relax your bottom for me. I can feel a uterus in there. It makes sense considering how small your penis is. Not really much of a male, are you? I'm suspecting that you are pregnant. I listen to your belly. There is a heartbeat. Guess you are in here to give birth then! I will start with g... Show more