You know you'll buy this clip no matter what it contains. Surely it can't just be me sitting on my perfect ass, giving you nothing. Can it?

You haven't earned my attention yet. Your only purpose in life is to empty your wallet, trying to make an impression on me. Pay for my comfort. Pay for me to relax and do the things I love, all while ignoring your pathetic presence. Then pay more, for the privilege of staring at my perfect form. You're obsessed with me. As you should be.