Now listen, fresh meat. I’m here to help! I’m a senior, so it’s important that I take you under my wing and make sure you can successfully make it through college. Think of me as your... big step-sister. Taking you under my wing and all, getting you wrecked. Yes, it's true. I'm here to get you through your first toasted college experience. With me, you'll be taken good care of and can make it to another party, easy. I won’t be getting toasted or anything, this is more of a thing for YOU. You’ll feel like a real pro by the time we’re through.

Now, what you learn about college is tha...

Now listen, fresh meat. I’m here to help! I’m a senior, so it’s important that I take you under my wing and make sure you can successfully make it through college. Think of me as your... big step-sister. Taking you under my wing and all, getting you wrecked. Yes, it's true. I'm here to get you through your first toasted college experience. With me, you'll be taken good care of and can make it to another party, easy. I won’t be getting toasted or anything, this is more of a thing for YOU. You’ll feel like a real pro by the time we’re through.

Now, what you learn about college is that the freshman have to ask people to get them alcohol. Or they steal it from home. So sometimes, you get a mixture of some weird stuff to drink. And this is what we're doing. Drinking some random stuff from step-mom and step-dad's cabinet. Here's a bottle of Japanese soju! Lucky you, I bet you'll never even drink anything this nasty and this strong ever again. Well, how are you feeling? Ready to do this? Time to get comfortable, this is gonna be a long ride. And remember, this is all part of you fitting in.

Life will be so much easier for you in this universe of toasted college life. Hey, why don't you get comfortable, too? Well, let’s get you loaded. Comfortably.

Okay, in college, there’s no way anyone is stopping at one shot. You’ll be given so many, especially at the beginning. And if you’re going to be getting totally blitzed, you need to be ready. And... let’s get another in you. You know, I think I need to at least somewhat know what you’re up to. Mentally. Keep tabs on you. I’ll have to have some, though I won’t be drinking too much. I’ll have the next two with you.

How are you feeling? Hmmm... okay... Plastered is on the way. You’re already acting silly. You’re in college now, you need to be mature. Let me show you what I mean, okay? If you’re about to stumble around... You just act cool, pull it together. We drink more to get used to it. If you’re feeling stumbly wumbly, you just drink more. And when you want to strip tease for a cute freshman, you pull it together. Nobody wants to be checking out the loaded chick struggling to stand. Toasty as a skunk, aren't we? I mean, aren't you? Dear, pull it together.

How are you feeling? How do my tits look to you? Loving this or... what? Do you like my pantyhose? I mean, I'm showing off my body. You're getting the senior treatment here. Hey... pull it together. Embrace it. To the human body, let’s take some shots!

How much more? Too much? You okay? Aw. Look at you, SO loaded up on booze. Now, one more thought. If you’re still toasted for class. There’s an art to turning in a report to your professor at this stage, too. They’ll super look down on you if you’re toasted... So pull it together. Professor, I’ve got my report here. BAM! Look how good that was, walking to his desk. Wow, almost tripped there, heh... I'm... I’m a real professional professor. I could be a professor.

OMG You are getting so hammered! Damn! Look, we gotta act... more... mature now... Let’s play a game. Shot first. Have you lost count? I have.