I have the most ideal motorcycle riding outfit on, a tight red shiny catsuit, thigh high, high heeled boots, my safety rope harness securely fastened to my chest and my hips, as I put my leather fingerless gloves on as I explain to you that I am super ready to go for a ride to get some wind in my hair. The next thing I know, I am suspended in mid air but no bike in sight. I am almost in the perfect position to ride with my legs out, my arms loose to hold on the handlebars but no motorcycle. This is pure torment. What comes next is even worse. Not only is it not a Harley (my preference) but ...

I have the most ideal motorcycle riding outfit on, a tight red shiny catsuit, thigh high, high heeled boots, my safety rope harness securely fastened to my chest and my hips, as I put my leather fingerless gloves on as I explain to you that I am super ready to go for a ride to get some wind in my hair. The next thing I know, I am suspended in mid air but no bike in sight. I am almost in the perfect position to ride with my legs out, my arms loose to hold on the handlebars but no motorcycle. This is pure torment. What comes next is even worse. Not only is it not a Harley (my preference) but a Honda that is reachable with my unbound hands, but I still cant ride. I am in the ideal position as if I did a throttle or a superman as I'm riding. This is the hardest mental suspension i've ever done. i can feel it, but I cant work it. Pictures are even taken for a centerfold but damn it, not for the Harley I own, but for Knotty Guys quiet fancy bike. Geesh. I just want to ride, damn it. The rope keeps me from riding, but I sure do beep the horn and bitch a lot. Even after he ballgags me, that still doesn't keep me quiet or content. What a pal, a funny torment giving pal.