You’ve been in my class for a while now. I can tell when you’re not your best self. Is everything alright at home? Feeling a bit down? Well, as your professor, I don’t like to see my students fail. Why don’t I give you a little pick me up? I’ve watched you stare at my slick black pantyhose and my tight skirt. Would you like to see them a little closer? Maybe a little masturbation will perk you up a little bit.

Then, when you’re full of all those feel-good chemicals, you can get back to your schoolwork.