I’m leaving you and I’m taking everything. You can’t possibly be surprised, honey. You knew I was a bitch when you married me and it’s frankly your fault for falling for me. You were just a conquest, this marriage was basically a business arrangement. I wanted to be the rich stay-at-home trophy wife, milking every last dollar out of you until I crafted the perfect exit strategy. I’m taking everything out of our bank account, as well as all of your stocks, bonds and assets. I’m taking the house. All that expensive equipment you bought with your hard earned cash for your little hobbies? That ...

I’m leaving you and I’m taking everything. You can’t possibly be surprised, honey. You knew I was a bitch when you married me and it’s frankly your fault for falling for me. You were just a conquest, this marriage was basically a business arrangement. I wanted to be the rich stay-at-home trophy wife, milking every last dollar out of you until I crafted the perfect exit strategy. I’m taking everything out of our bank account, as well as all of your stocks, bonds and assets. I’m taking the house. All that expensive equipment you bought with your hard earned cash for your little hobbies? That will be mine too. You will be left with nothing to sell but your dignity :)

You thought I was in love with you, but it was all a game for me. I saw my return on investment and I went for it. Can you blame me, babe? You were such an easy target. I hunted you down. A woman of my caliber will have no problem finding a richer, hotter, more successful man than you. Meanwhile, your divorced ass will struggle to ever get back on your feet. Everyone saw this coming. My friends all had bets going for how long our marriage would last, lol. Who do you think had the most faith in us, honey? I told them all today was the day before I even told you. In fact, they are at a bar right now, waiting for me so we can celebrate. Awww, does the truth sting like the bitch I am? I could keep pretending, if you want. I could keep the charade up all throughout the divorce process. I got soo good at pretending during our marriage. I faked every orgasm. Every time I came home with wet panties and said it was because of you - that was a blatant lie. It was never you making my panties wet. It was never you I was thinking of when we fucked. Oh, and I’ve been cheating on you.

I’m cutting the chord, dropping the act, getting REAL and I suggest you do the same. Take your favorite old t-shirts and stuff ‘em in an IKEA bag. That’s all you get. Bye bye, honey.