Autumn time in England produces the best weather for muddy welly boots. After taking a nice long walk in the English countryside, it is time for a slave to come and service my wellies to keep them clean. Lick and suck the dirt off and feel the gritty mud crunch between your teeth, I will help you swallow it down by spitting over the boots and encouraging you. If you don't, you'll be coming on the next walk with me, and if you think THIS is humiliating, you might want to think again. Eat up.