I’m a sex counsellor and you’ve come to see me because you’ve been struggling to get laid and you’re hoping I can help you reach a solution. You have high hopes of getting a blowjob, since it seems like a more simple and attainable goal, and maybe eventually work your way up to getting pussy. I review your file and notice something very telling—your cock size. Noting its shortcomings when fully erect, coupled with the fact that you are a chronic masturbator who spends his free time jerking off to big dick porn, I have decided that I have just the remedy for you. And it’s nothing like you we...

I’m a sex counsellor and you’ve come to see me because you’ve been struggling to get laid and you’re hoping I can help you reach a solution. You have high hopes of getting a blowjob, since it seems like a more simple and attainable goal, and maybe eventually work your way up to getting pussy. I review your file and notice something very telling—your cock size. Noting its shortcomings when fully erect, coupled with the fact that you are a chronic masturbator who spends his free time jerking off to big dick porn, I have decided that I have just the remedy for you. And it’s nothing like you were expecting!