Check out my man's sexy beard. It's so long and full! You WISH you could grow a beard like his, but you're just a b*by faced loser with a stroking addiction. There is no chance on earth you could be as manly as him. You could always attempt to grow out your facial hair, but it would look patchy and ugly. Silly loser! Only real men can grow beards, while all you have is one forearm that is noticeably more muscular than the other. Stroke to the man that has everything you want and more.