The first step to digital utopia is to accept the truth. Your wife literally hates you. She hates your face, your dick, your voice, the way you smell and your very existence. The reason your wife hates you so much is because you are ordinary in every way; there is nothing special about you at all.

You can't sing, you can't dance, you aren't attractive, sexy, or smart.

::NOW EXHALE::

Don't you feel better now that you've released all your hangups and aspirations and settled into the basic piece of nothing you are? Lets begin to treat you the way you deserve.