While working out on my exercise ball I hear these strange sounds. I stop and say What's that noise? Maybe I'm hearing things. I shrug & go back to what I was doing.
OK Now I know I'm not hearing things. What is that sound?
I look around to find source of noise. I say where is that noise coming from?
After searching I finally find the source. I jump back and scream!
Who are you? What are you? And WTF are doing in my room?!
You're hiding? From who? What's going on?
I start looking out windows. There's a bunch of agents outside my house!
OMG! What's going on? You're innocent & you will explain later? You better!
Can you hide me? Can I hide you?! I ponder for a short time thinking of a safe place.
I have JUST the perfect spot!
I scoop the tiny fugitive up into my hand, turn around & get ready to stuff him in butt hole.
I spread my giant sweaty ass cheeks and stuff him up my sweaty chute and slam my massive butt cheeks closed. There! They definitely won't find you there!
OK you're safe but you better explain WTF is going on.
Oh no! They're knocking on my door!
Shhhhhh be quiet & stop squirming! It's stinky & sweaty because I've been working out and havent had a shower yet.
I go to door show door just open a little & here's Dectective Butts.
Have I seen who? What is the description?
Nope haven't seen him.
Give me a card just in case I do & I will call you right away.
Ok thank you! Have a good day!
Ok they left.
I look over and see another tiny fugitive. Now you better start explaining what the hell is going on! Where is your friend? A safe place. And you're going to join your friend until I get to the bottom of this mess.
I start grabbing my big belly. Oh no! All that excitement got me nervous and gassy. When my anxiety gets going I get gassy.
I start farting. Oh no! I farted on him & may have given him a concussion or worse. I'm really sorry about this.
Oh that smells really bad. I shouldn't have ate those enchiladas. Oh no! Here comes another one! I fart again
Of all the places to hide you?! Well I knew it was the only place they wouldn't find you.
I cant stop farting!
One big blast & he flies out of my ass giving him a concussion.
He feels woozy & dizzy.
How do you feel? Weak? Disoriented? Good.
I grab card, pick up phone call agent.
I knew they were looking for you. I saw your face and tiny stature on the news. You didn't think I was going to harbor a mini fugitive and not collect on the reward?
Hello agent Butts yes this is Miss Mina Luciano.
I have the mini fugitive you've been looking for.
Yes. I'd like to collect my reward money now.
Ok I'll be waiting. Oh don't worry he's not going anywhere.
I get a knock on my door.
Hello detective. Now I can expect that reward money in my account in a few days? OK perfect!
I reach in the back of my work out leggings and hand over the mini fugitives.
They might be a little stinky. DON'T ASK! It's a long story.
I close door.
Get a call on my phone it's the detective. Jails are full I will have to keep him here for a while. How long? I'm not really sure. Detective did not give me a time frame. It could be awhile. Now where to put you so you don't flee. Hmmmm :::ponder:::
I got it! I have just the perfect place. A place they are familiar with and will never escape. My asshole.
Now back to working out on my exercise ball.
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