You want a chick who is not a girly girl.

Someone who will drink with you, grill on the weekends and watch football.

A girl who can burp louder than your boys.

I show up in comfy sweats, not tacky, tight polyester clothes. I am wearing minimal makeup and a sports bra, I am so real.

I chug club soda and show you my biggest burps and I can burp like a man, on queue. I take those bubbles down my throat into my stomach and push the carbonation back up with my strong diaphragm making a huge noise that makes your dick so hard.