I have my carpet installer all wrapped up in saran wrap and stuffed in my trunk. He couldn't seem to do his job, so now when I get him home he will be my carpet. I don't want my feet on the dirty floor so he will be beneath my feet. He will feel the pressure of me standing on him. He will lick my feet clean. I actually like him beneath my soles. Hopefully he will learn to do his job and install carpet, that way he won't have to BE my carpet.