I have been outside playing all day, getting hot and sweaty. I know there is nothing you love more than sweaty stinky socks and sneakers. You will have to beg me to watch my shoes come off so I can stretch my toes out. I want you to really beg me - I want to see tears running down your face. You begging me makes me happy, and if I am happy perhaps I will take mercy on you and allow you to watch me unlace my shoes one by one, slipping them off my feet. Maybe I will allow you to sniff, but not touch, my sneakers.