So I just came back from the movies with my boyfriend and I decide to use my neat human doormat to trample and clean all the grime from the movies off my shoes. This pathetic loser has been waiting by the door the entire time I have been gone just to worship my feet and boots. I even went out of my way to step in a nice wad of gum for him. Then I show him the special treat I brought home from the movies. Lets just say its kind of stuck to my two day old unwashed socks.