Those skinny jeans are starting to look a little tight...

Listen to me humiliate and tease you for being a hipster FUCK that's getting too fat for his band shirts and tight pants. You've realized the pleasures of the flesh. There's more to life than collecting records and partying. And besides, what's the point of going to parties and clubs now that the skinny pretty girls entirely ignore you? You can't hide that potbelly anymore... Instead I encourage you to grow addicted to new pleasures: eating, edging, cumming, and napping. Getting fatter feels so good, doesn't it? So instead o... Show more