(custom)

"You are my neighbor. You show up at my door unannounced (minutes after You saw wifey’s car pull out of the driveway) wearing thigh high socks and a sweater. You are on Your way to the mall and decided to pop in and borrow my credit card. Seeing my confusion, You explain: the other night You were out for drinks with wifey and she was complaining about her sex life...how i only want to have sex if she’s wearing socks. She hates feeling like all i care about are the socks, not her, and so she refuses to wear them and thus we haven’t had sex in months. You pr... Show more