Part One of "A Dishonorable Demotion"

I am cold militant woman, everyone knows this. Everyone except for this putz here who has been pissing around trimming his body hair when he is supposed to be maintaining peak physical form for Me. What a sore sight for My eyes. I command the lazy slob to do a variety of exercises while worshiping My feet and ass. Failing to do his ass kissing sit-ups he is banished to the cage of shame, where he must wait for a time he can be of use again while I run off to train the rest of the pigs to be men.