Of course I shrunk you. You were a constant annoyance in my life. Now look at you; completely powerless, as small as a crumb. So small, in fact, that you could fit into my pores. My body needs some maintenance and you’re the perfect size to get underneath my toenails, scraping the d-ad skin away. After I put you to use, of course I’m going to eat you. Swish you around in my mouth where you will clang into my enormous teeth and be swallowed whole into the darkness of my acidic stomach.