You wish I was yours this Valentine's Day. You wish I was yours everyday. You wish I was your girlfriend instead of her. I'm hotter than she is. I'm more fun than she is. I'm kinkier too. I know you better than she does. I know about all your dirty, little perversions. She's never going to understand you the way that I do. She's never going to turn you on like I do. Money spent on me is more appropriate. Time spent with me is more enjoyable. Orgasms with me are more explosive. Even spending Valentine's Day right here with me is better.