Try Doctor Mercer's NEW fantabulous medical treatments and devices, developed exclusively for those extreme and bothering cases of female hysteria! Symptoms will be cleared immediately, and your wife will be returned to you refreshed and invigorated! If the hysteria persists, not to worry - your wife will be promptly transferred to our extensive long term care treatment facilities, removing her as a danger to decency and society at large, at no cost to you! Just sign the papers.