Poor little wifey. Poor, naive, frumpy, boring, vanilla, clueless wifey. That dumb bitch doesn't have a clue that you're pretty much cheating on her with Me. We might not be napping together or flirting at the office, but let's face it, no one gets you as hard as I do.

She doesn't know you like I do. She doesn't know that you pay Me. She doesn't know the I inflict upon you. She doesn't know you enjoy it. She doesn't know just how warped you are.

I do. I'm pretty sure if she knew how obsessed you are with Me that she'd consider it cheating too, don't you think, slut?