No way. You. The loser. On a date. With a woman? This has to be some kind of joke. There's no way any self respecting woman would ever go on a date with a creep like you. It's not like you're attractive, charming, funny... I could go on, but I'd be here all day listing the thing you are not.

HAHAHAHA. Is she an ? That'd make sense. Why else would anyone go on a "date" with you if they were not being paid for it?