I've got gas again! My asshole is so stinky sometimes! These farts smell so good! I wish you were here to smell them! They're so rich and bitter and sexy! I love describing my farts to you and telling you how they smell!

If you were here I would fart right in your face! I'd see if you could guess what I ate for breakfast, lunch, and dinner just by smelling my farts! Can you guess what I had!? Mmm! That fart smells like eggs! Oh wow! That one smells like meat! Let me tell you what I ate and how my farts smell while I fart for you!

Enjoy!