I'm all ready to go out. I'm My cute, short floral dress. I call My friend to make sure she is coming and as soon as I set the phone down, I am surprised with a loud fart from My bum! Oh no.... this can only mean 1 think. I really gotta go! FML, and we know that I have to fart... like a TON, before I can use the bathroom. So I do so. But then I run into the bathroom, pick up My book, and start reading. While I evacuate My bowels into the toilet!