Your giant step-dad is such a douchefuck, he doesn't even know how to make a good sandwich. Yeah, it's nice of him to offer to share it with you. Otherwise, you'd starve, right? You're so tiny, you can't even open the fridge door. But an open-faced chicken salad sandwich is such a STEP-DAD thing to eat. What, are you 50? Then he puts mustard on it without even asking you. Jesus! Who puts mustard on chicken salad? He takes a phone call from work even though it's his day off, so you decide to start without him. But you get stuck in the mustard and can't escape! He comes back and starts eating...

Your giant step-dad is such a douchefuck, he doesn't even know how to make a good sandwich. Yeah, it's nice of him to offer to share it with you. Otherwise, you'd starve, right? You're so tiny, you can't even open the fridge door. But an open-faced chicken salad sandwich is such a STEP-DAD thing to eat. What, are you 50? Then he puts mustard on it without even asking you. Jesus! Who puts mustard on chicken salad? He takes a phone call from work even though it's his day off, so you decide to start without him. But you get stuck in the mustard and can't escape! He comes back and starts eating the sandwich and doesn't even see you, you're so tiny and covered in mustard. CHOMP! CHOMP! His giant gaping mouth gets closer and closer to you, and the mustard drips down disgustingly on his beard. You don't know which is more terrifying; the impending doom of being eaten alive by your own giant step-dad, or watching him chew up close with his mouth open.

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