Listen up, you pathetic gooner, I know exactly what you are. You're nothing but a mindless jerkaholic, a slave to your own pathetic urges. So go on, keep pumping away, like the good little gooner you are. Each stroke strips away what little dignity you have left, and each mind-numbing session pulls you further into the abyss. You're mine to command, a puppet on strings, and I love watching you unravel. Keep going, keep stroking, and remember — with each pathetic tug, you're proving just how weak, how utterly insignificant you really are.

Listen up, you pathetic gooner, I know exactly what you are. You're nothing but a mindless jerkaholic, a slave to your own pathetic urges. So go on, keep pumping away, like the good little gooner you are. Each stroke strips away what little dignity you have left, and each mind-numbing session pulls you further into the abyss. You're mine to command, a puppet on strings, and I love watching you unravel. Keep going, keep stroking, and remember — with each pathetic tug, you're proving just how weak, how utterly insignificant you really are.