I went out to treat myself at a bar after a long day at work. We instantly connected, so you took me back to your place and we had an amazing night.

I feel resting in complete bliss, but then upon waking the morning, I realized you had left without as much as a goodbye or leaving your phone number! I didn't even know what side of town I was on because of all of the fun we had the night before!

So I destroyed your favorite, expensive down feather pillows and called myself a cab and left. Take that, jerk!