*Yawn* I'm so bored. Really, terribly, dreadfully BORED. There's nothing to do, no entertainment, and you just don't meet my needs. If I call you in here, will you entertain me? Will you make me feel like this relationship isn't just a waste? Will you make me smile again? It's been so long since I've smiled. I know! Why don't we play a little game! Let's use our imaginations and pretend... A-HA!!!! I've done it! I've actually turned you into a magazine! You're nothing but a 2-dimensional, flat-brained, small bit of throw-away paper. But you will entertain me for just a few more minutes. I'...

*Yawn* I'm so bored. Really, terribly, dreadfully BORED. There's nothing to do, no entertainment, and you just don't meet my needs. If I call you in here, will you entertain me? Will you make me feel like this relationship isn't just a waste? Will you make me smile again? It's been so long since I've smiled. I know! Why don't we play a little game! Let's use our imaginations and pretend... A-HA!!!! I've done it! I've actually turned you into a magazine! You're nothing but a 2-dimensional, flat-brained, small bit of throw-away paper. But you will entertain me for just a few more minutes. I'll flip through you, read you, thumb you over, and decide if you have any additional worth due to your content. Ha! I doubt it. You always seem to bore me no matter what I turn you into. And you know magazines are just temporary things... you're going in my trash very soon!