You and I broke up recently because you had basically nothing going for you. Lucky for me the relationship was quick! Anyways, out of the blue you message me asking if we can talk. You go on to explain that you have found my online profiles. That you have been stalking me basically, you go on and on about how badly you want me back. The problem is, I don't want to date a fucking loser like you. You could always just be a slave though. Paying for my time, doing whatever the fuck I want you to do. In fact let's go to the ATM right now my loser slave ex-boyfriend.