Another year gone by and look, somebody’s still a virgin. Sure, this could finally be the year you lose your virginity, but then again, maybe it isn’t. One thing’s for certain though, you can’t stay away from my videos, so maybe it’s time you dedicate yourself to a more realistic goal: serving me properly. I don’t want to see you set yourself up for another summer of failure and honestly, would this imaginary potential girlfriend really compare to me anyway? I get you, I understand you in ways she never could and isn’t it better to be my plaything than to be nothing at all?

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