For your bedtime story tonight, I'm going to read you a special book about potty training! Even though you can't seem to keep your pants dry, I think that reading this will give you some ideas on how one day you can tackle the potty.

During the book, I make condescending but loving comments about your lack of potty training, your plastic training potty and how crinkly your diapers are.

This is the perfect bedtime for a little one who wants a bedtime story and blushing cheeks!