What? You said you wanted a "normal relaxing night in" I think watching netflix in bed is about as normal and relaxing as evenings get. Well in my defence, you never specifically said you didn't want to be tied up and have my farts blasted all over you while I watched TV... So honestly this is entirely your fault. Now shut the fuck up and suck up my gas while I watch netflix, loser

What? You said you wanted a "normal relaxing night in" I think watching netflix in bed is about as normal and relaxing as evenings get. Well in my defence, you never specifically said you didn't want to be tied up and have my farts blasted all over you while I watched TV... So honestly this is entirely your fault. Now shut the fuck up and suck up my gas while I watch netflix, loser