You’re all alone on Valentine’s Day. This is nothing new, so don’t bother feeling sorry for yourself. Instead of jerking off with your tears, I have a little game I want to play with you. I saw these disgusting twinkies at the store, loaded with gooey pink filling, and I immediately thought of you. I can’t even imagine how many calories are in these things, but guess what, loser? You’re gonna eat the whole box! Yum yum. Stuff your fat belly for Goddess!