Happy Valentines Day Loser. Another year alone huh? Have you EVER had a Valentine? Didn't think so.

You see this lollipop right here? It came attached to a wad of cash that one of my many suitors gifted me on this lovely holiday. I know you wouldn't know anything about that, since no one wants to be your Valentine.

This lollipop is delicious though! I can't get enough of it. I bet no woman has ever said that about you. Come to think of it, this lollipop is probably getting more action than you ever had. Tha'ts just fucking sad isn't it? A piece of heart shaped candy is get...

Happy Valentines Day Loser. Another year alone huh? Have you EVER had a Valentine? Didn't think so.

You see this lollipop right here? It came attached to a wad of cash that one of my many suitors gifted me on this lovely holiday. I know you wouldn't know anything about that, since no one wants to be your Valentine.

This lollipop is delicious though! I can't get enough of it. I bet no woman has ever said that about you. Come to think of it, this lollipop is probably getting more action than you ever had. Tha'ts just fucking sad isn't it? A piece of heart shaped candy is getting more play than you ever had in your life! Watch the way I suck and lick this hard sugar rock. You're jealous aren't you. Jealous of an inanimate object. As if you could be any more pathetic.